Monday, August 2, 2010


Feeling a bit down today
All weekend actually
This is a hard week of the year for me.

Tomorrow it will have been 11 years, and when I allow myself to relive those moments in my mind, it feels like it happened yesterday.

My heart beats too fast
I can feel the adreneline pumping through my veins
My eyes tear up before I even realize it

Walking through the door and hearing the words
Crumbling to the floor in a mess of sobs
Packing my bag without really knowing what I'm putting in it
Driving through the night
Walking into the too brightly lit hospital
Later walking into the too dark and too quiet house
Somehow fumbling through the worst week of my life

My heart still aches
Even 11 years later

And this year I add the additional pain
Of PC's wedding anniversary falling on the same day
It seems harder this year than last year for sure

So a sad
down week
for me


1 comment:

  1. Your words make me must have been an awful day since all this time has not seemed to heal your wound. Hugs!